Twenty Onwards Media

Al Gore's sacrifice

EARTH—Former vice president Al Gore—who for the past three decades has unsuccessfully attempted to warn humanity of the coming destruction of our planet, only to be mocked and derided by the very people he has tried to save—launched his infant son into space Monday in the faint hope that his only child would reach the safety of another world.

"I tried to warn them, but the Elders of this planet would not listen," said Gore, who in 2000 was nearly banished to a featureless realm of nonexistence for promoting his unpopular message. "They called me foolish and laughed at my predictions. Yet even now, the Midwest is flooded, the ice caps are melting, and the cities are rocked with tremors, just as I foretold. Fools! Why didn't they heed me before it was too late?"

Want to know more about Gore's incredible feat? Check it out:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/al_gore_places_infant_son_in

Up, Up and away!

Germans Not Amused, Nor The French

And Now, From 'Rowan Atkinson Live In Belfast',

'I Hate The French' by Howard Goodall

Would like to give out your number to about 2 million people

Well, the front page story on the Times of India today was about a fool who spent Rs. 1.5Million on getting a exclusive cellphone number in an auction. And in their great wisdom the paper printed the fancy number for their millions of readers to read and maybe drunk dial.

This guy is surely going to get some interesting calls on his new number.

Too Sexy for my Bus!

In the course of coursing through the morning paper i came across an interesting piece of news.
[Note: Confirm its interesting nature by clicking on the link above before reading ahead.]
Thank God(if He/She/It exists) the driver was German and spoke his mind about the distraction caused. Because if this were to happen in a DTC bus the driver would ogle away and cause an accident which will not even be noticed by the male passengers of the bus...because they'd be ogling too.

How to prepare for an Alien Invasion

This is Yahoo's Top 5 odd news story of the day . I had nothing better to do right now...

For Those Who Missed It

BBC Commentator, Paul Danahar analyzes the recent bruhaha about Shilpa Shetty on the UK Big Brother quite straightforwardly. Despite some effigy burning, the Indian response seemed mature and restrained. Though, anyone in India being shocked over people facing racism overseas needs to get out more if possible.

What the F#$k?

15yr Old Girl in India hangs herself after getting depressed over Saddam's Death, What's Next?

Oh yea, Happy New Year...

Bin Laden the Elephant

The BBC reports that a hunt is on in the Indian state of Assam for an rogue elephant nick-named Bin Laden. Quite like his other namesake, the elephant has become a mass killer, trampling 14 people in the past couple of months. And also like his human (or inhuman) namesake, the elephant's been difficult to hunt down, hiding in the dense Assamese jungles. Hopefully, the hunters in this case will be more successful in hunting down and killing this beast than the ones searching for the other one. Only in India will you get such creative titles for everything from a animal to a shop.

UPDATE: Bin Laden (the elephant) caught and shot dead...hopefully so will his human namesake soon.

Report: Indian men want smaller condoms

The BBC is quite gleefully reporting on their front page that some recent study by the Indian Council of Medical Research concluded that Indian men have smaller penises...after the 100th joke made to me today i had to blog about this.

First of all, its not about the size, its how you use it. Secondly, Indian men came up with the damn Kama Sutra and look at our population, they clearly know how to use it and that too well. Thirdly, i wouldn't pay too much attention to a study of 1200 volunteers, i find it hard to take that as a satisfactory sample for nearly 600 million men. Lastly, i have a feeling Penis pumps are about to become really popular in Delhi.

To Catch a Predator with many South Asians

Dateline NBC the magazine show on NBC has been running its "To Catch a Predator" series for a while now. The show goes about to various cities, catching online sexual predators on TV. Sex predators aiming in on children seems to be on a rise in the U.S, the show has been catching them with the help of the Perverted Justice website. The recent episode took place in Sonoma County, California near the silicon valley, and many of the predators netted happened to be South Asians if not Indians from the Valley trying to solicit sex with 13-yr old girls online and then showing up at their house and eventually falling for the trap. It was really surprising to see so many South Asians or Indians turning up and these are highly educated and well-to do men and at the same time perverts. This is a scary trend, especially when you think what the stats might be on such men in India, where i presume this goes highly under-reported.